Coaching for Deep Dives
Forum Workshop with Marc Stockli · Thursday 5 March 2026 · 9:00–13:00
EO Network
Purpose & Core Outcome
Purpose
Teach a structured approach to deep dive coaching in forum settings — clarifying an unresolved, emotionally-charged issue so the presenter gains genuine insight and focus.
What You Will Walk Away With
  • The right mindset for deep dive coaching
  • Clear suitability criteria for when to use it
  • Four core coaching skill sets
  • Hands-on practice in breathing prep and reflecting back
What Is a Deep Dive?
Deep dive coaching clarifies an issue that sits at the intersection of story and struggle — what happened on the outside and what it stirs on the inside.
The Factual / Story Part
What happened — the events, context, and situation the presenter is living with.
The Inner Struggle / Emotional Part
How it is impacting the person — the feelings, tensions, and unresolved weight behind the story.

Goal: Crystallise both parts so the topic becomes clear and actionable insight can emerge — not advice, but clarity.
When to Use a Deep Dive
All three criteria must apply before initiating a deep dive. If any one is missing, a different format will serve the presenter better.
1
Important to the Presenter
The issue must be personally significant — something that truly matters to them, not a routine operational question.
2
Unresolved
The topic requires more clarity. If it is already solved or simply needs information, a deep dive adds no value.
3
Tied to Strong Emotion
There is an inner struggle to explore. Emotional charge is not a barrier — it is the signal that a deep dive belongs here.
Mindset & Ground Rules
"When my brain is in problem-solving mode, the one thing I'm not doing at the same time is listening." — Marc Stockli
Confidentiality
All stories shared during the session remain within the room. This is the foundation of psychological safety.
Quiet Mind First
Suspend problem-solving mode before you begin. Your job is to listen, mirror, and facilitate — not fix or advise.
The Presenter Owns the Issue
The coach is a partner and facilitator, never an advisor. Avoid leading questions, experience-sharing, or steering the narrative.
Practical Structure & Timing
Full Deep Dive
40–60 minutes as a guideline. Many reach clarity closer to 40 minutes. Set aside a full hour to allow space without pressure.
Training Exercises
6-minute coach/paraphrase drills
5–6 minutes for mini deep-dive presentations
Preparing Your Mini Topic
For today's exercises, come ready with a real issue you can speak to for 5–6 minutes. Structure it as:
  1. A brief factual summary of what is happening
  1. The feelings it brings up for you
  1. Where you feel stuck or unclear

The topic does not need to be your biggest current challenge — choose something genuine but comfortable to share in a workshop setting.
Four Foundational Skill Sets
Marc deconstructs deep coaching into four progressively stacked skill sets. Today's session develops the two foundational layers everything else is built upon.
1
2
3
4
1
Layer 1: Quiet Mind
Finding stillness before you coach
2
Layer 2: Reflecting Back
Paraphrasing with precision and empathy
3
Layer 3: Advanced Skill Set
Built on layers 1 & 2 (developed in further sessions)
4
Layer 4: Mastery Integration
Full deep dive fluency and facilitation confidence
Exercise: Finding Your Quiet Mind
The Setup
Work in pairs, sitting with knees nearly touching. Hold silent one-minute eye contact. Before the minute begins, complete three guided breaths: inhale slowly, hold briefly, exhale fully — repeated three times.
What Participants Reported
  • Less self-talk and mental chatter
  • Greater clarity and presence
  • Reduced judgment of themselves and their partner
  • Increased openness and receptivity

Key learning: Begin every coaching conversation with a short settling ritual — three breaths, a five-minute walk, or simply a moment of stillness. A quiet mind is not a luxury; it is a prerequisite.
Tool: Reflecting Back (Paraphrasing)
"Reflecting back gives the presenter clarity — because you will hear yourself talk now via my perception." — Marc Stockli
What It Is
Periodically and politely interrupt to paraphrase what you heard — in your own words, without interpretation or judgement.
Why It Works
Confirms understanding · Gives the presenter a fresh perspective on their own story · Builds trust and deepens the conversation.
In Practice
Aim for 2–4 paraphrases spaced through the conversation. No questions — use nonverbal curiosity and open invitations to talk instead.
Reflecting back is not just a forum tool. It is equally powerful in negotiations, staff conversations, and family interactions — helping others feel heard and open up without feeling judged or directed.
Pair Exercise Instructions
Practise the skills in a structured 6-minute drill. Roles can be observed by a third person and switched between rounds.
01
Assign Roles
Designate a Coach, a Presenter, and optionally an Observer who notes paraphrase quality, timing, and the presenter's opening-up.
02
Presenter Prepares
Presenter shares their mini topic for 5–6 minutes: factual summary, feelings involved, and where they feel stuck or unclear.
03
Coach Listens and Reflects
Within the 6-minute window, find natural pauses to paraphrase three times. Ask no questions. Use only reflections and invitations to talk.
04
Debrief Together
After each round, ask the presenter: what did you notice? What insight emerged? What feels clearer now? Then switch roles.
What to Avoid as a Coach
These habits are natural — but they undermine the depth of the coaching and keep the presenter from finding their own clarity.
Problem-Solving Mode
Jumping into "fix" mode prevents genuine listening. When you are formulating solutions, you are no longer present with the presenter.
Leading Questions
Questions that steer or hint at a preferred answer corrupt the presenter's process. Your curiosity must be genuinely open.
Experience-Sharing
Sharing your own parallel story, however well-intentioned, shifts focus away from the presenter. Save it for brainstorming.
Giving Instructions
Telling the presenter what to do — even subtly — makes you an advisor, not a coach. Ideas may only be offered as gifts, never directives.
Coach's One-Page Checklist
Keep this with you during forum sessions as a quick reference before and during a deep dive.
Before You Begin
  1. Pause & take 1–3 breaths to find a quiet mind
  1. Confirm confidentiality with the group
  1. Confirm the presenter owns the issue
  1. Check all three suitability criteria are met
During the Deep Dive
  1. Listen fully — suspend problem-solving
  1. Paraphrase 2–4 times, spaced naturally
  1. Use nonverbal curiosity and open invitations
  1. If not a deep dive, pivot gracefully
After the Session
Ask the presenter: "What did you notice? What feels clearer? What might be your next step?" — Insight without action remains just a feeling.
Facilitation Guidance
Practical tips for forum coaches running deep dives in live settings.
Open with Calm
Invite both coach and presenter to breathe and settle before beginning — this improves listening quality and helps the presenter access their emotions more readily.
Offer Ideas as Gifts
If you have a perspective to share, frame it as a gift of experience or a brainstorming suggestion — never as a recommendation or directive.
Pivot Without Apology
If you realise mid-session that the topic is not suited to a deep dive, tell the group clearly and move to brainstorm or topic discussion. Pivoting is good facilitation.
Brainstorming Structure
If you switch to brainstorming, use fixed-order rounds with several short passes — this sustains creative energy and ensures everyone contributes equally.
Building the Muscle: Follow-Up Practice
Skills developed in a workshop need daily repetition to become instinct. Here is how to keep building after today.
Daily Paraphrase Practice
Intentionally reflect back once per day in ordinary conversations — with colleagues, family, or friends. Notice how people respond.
6-Minute Forum Drills
Run structured coach/presenter drills in future forum meetings to build muscle memory in a safe, familiar environment.
Breathing Ritual
Use the three-breath quiet-mind practice before any important coaching conversation, difficult meeting, or emotionally charged exchange.
Thank You — Now Go Coach
Deep dive coaching is one of the most generous things a forum member can offer. You are not here to solve — you are here to illuminate.
"When my brain is in problem-solving mode, the one thing I'm not doing at the same time is listening."
— Marc Stockli, Forum Workshop, March 2026